S13M4: Shirt over Hoody

3 games in, 1 to go before the first break in the season. Long time readers will know my disdain for international breaks, and to be honest, international football in general. Why can't we get to that Marxist ideal of no nation states, and just a global workers' paradise where say, nation states can't buy football clubs, or PE vultures can't come in and blow £1bn in 15 months.  I think the only footballing owners (assuming the clubs aren't returned to fan ownership and/or me with indefinite resources) should be self-made ranch owning people with a real interest in sports entertainment. And Tony Bloom because that story is nice. Heartwarming and stuff. 

In fact, having a look at all the owners of PL clubs, only 5 pass the Impossibilitee Fit & Proper Owners Test (IFPOT). I will allow Kroenke (post 2018), Shahid Khan (Wrestling, brilliant), Fenway (Moneyball), Luton as fan owned, Glazers for LOLs. The Nottingham Forest bloke should be allowed but gave Arsenal Covid so he's banned for life. Not great work from the FA.

Anyway, last time out, Chelsea clicked to beat Luton comfortably 3-0. Raheem reincarnated by Argentine parrilla. Spurs comfortably beat Bournemouth. The SouthWestish London derby ended all squares at the AliGTech and early *shock* goals at the Emirates and Old Trafford ended up with 10-man Fulham being elated with their rescued point whilst 10-man Forest ran out of puff against a resurgent Man Utd. Probably given Covid by their owner....

In fact, losing a man seemed so be helpful....more on this in a second.

The late game saw a massive shock with Brighton being dismantled at home by West Ham, although stats suggest a very different game. Didn't watch it. The Sunday saw Man City wobble to a late win against Sheffield United, Villa won leg one of the Claret-Blue TriDerby against Burnley before game of the weekend came at St James Park. Newcastle absolutely flew at Liverpool, with Trent lucky to escape a red card (Tomiyasu says Hi), van Dijk receiving a red card and Gordon putting Newcastle 1-0 up within the first 30 mins. However, in the last 10 minutes, Darwin (finally...thanks FPL gods) got some minutes, scored twice, bingo bango bongo, Liverpool get a massive win and Eddie Howe looks very angry. He's a weird one. Gone from golden boy at Bournemouth 10 years ago to just quite annoying, so happy with that.

Especially if the Saudis then come and take Salah this week. Take Alisson too.

S13M3: Suspension

Well, 2 weeks in to the league season and there's already lots to discuss.

I'm going to focus on 2 aspects - the early separation of the league and the PGMOL soap opera.

We're 2 games in and already the league table is starting to divide into groups that might well stay that way for the rest of the season. Sure, samll sample size, fixture computer etc etc but look at the top 6 now and tell me who's missing? Newcastle played Man City so maybe swap them out for Brentford but would anyone suggest that Chelsea or Man Utd are nailed on for CL with the way they've played so far? Similarly, down the bottom, with the exception of Chelsea - is there anyone in the bottom 8 who's unlikely to be involved in the relegation discussion this year? Lots of projection on Burnley but the other 6 really are likely to stuggle on current evidence.

Still a week left of the window, and obviously only 3 can go down, but we might be in the least worst situation, yet again.

Now, as for the officials. Every sodding year there's a new diktat, a new decision that *Insert Crime* is the worst thing about football ever. There's a ridiculous overreaction from the PGMOL, it doesn't fix anything and causes uproar and ridiculous events before being quietly dropped.

'twas ever thus.

This year, we've got the FIFA-led thing on time-wasting - or ball in play time. Now I LOVE the 13 mins of injury time and I'm a huge fan, but that's a bit counter to also booking people for "wasting" time - it's not wasted because it's now added on. And if it's being slowed down legally, then that's part of the game. Also you don't need new laws - enforce the ones you have. When was the last time you saw a keeper penalised for holding onto the ball for more than 6 seconds - a timeframe explicitly listed in the rules. It's like Let It Flow,  it's like offside changes and everything else. 

Football doesn't always need to be complicated. If games last 100 mins because of time wasting, then the teams have a choice - learn to manage games over 100 mins with subs etc or don't waste as much time. 

 Howard Webb - give me a call. 

S13: We Go Again

Hello! Welcome back old friends & hopefully hello new friends!

Astonishingly, Impossibilitee is entering its 13th season. 13. Mental. I have no idea where all the time has gone - and for the few of you who've been playing since day 1 - what on earth is the matter with you? 

This all started off as a stupid idea, that then grew into a tech enabled stupid idea, that then fuelled an interest in data and levelled up my spreadsheet skills and somehow, has kept going throughout jobs, pandemics, good life stuff & bad life stuff. It's outlived loads of other hobbies and I think has worked it's way through at least 3, if not 4, or even 5 laptops. 

I've just had a flick back through the Internet to see what else happened in August 2010. The Iraq war ended. Tiger Woods got divorced. Love the way you Lie was at number 1. All probably foreshadowing something or another.

Anyway - I'm massively grateful that you've come back again and am very excited to get another season of mediocre predicting under my belt.

For the first time, the new season has sort of crept up on me and I'm not sure why. I always try and divert away from football in the summer and follow other sports, so maybe it's that. Maybe it's other life events. All I know is I've blinked and it's August and I need to crank out a preview blog, predos, announce some changes and so on before the first game in 9 days.

The Technical Stuff

So - let's start with the formalities. If you've played before, skip this paragraph. If you haven't let me direct you to the Rules tab above. It's pretty simple. Each week, you choose which team you think will win the match, or whether you think it'll be a draw. Think Football Pools style for those of you over 60. Each corrrect prediction = 1 point. Scores are averaged out over the season in a leaderboard - best predictor at the end wins the coveted Impossibilitee trophy. Bylaw - if a matchweek has fewer than 7 games, we ignore it, if it has 7-9 games, it get's pro-rated. 

That's it. That's the game. For those who like a flutter and want to share their 10 match accumulator odds, there's an *optional* field to fill in.

We also have included a bunch of celebrity/tech-led predictors and models - just for fun and to benchmark yourself against. 

The New Stuff

This year - there's an added incentive.  Being the Global Brandbassador that I am, Impossibilitee has attracted blue chip sponsorship, so there is a CASH PRIZE for the best human players. The total pot is £100 - to be split as follows

Best Human Player:  £70
2nd Best: £20
3rd Best: £10

The caveat - you have to play 31 weeks to qualify. That's >80% - so it'll be a real test of the best predictors over the course of the season. I'll still be doing the leaderboard as always at a 67% threshold, but those ineligible for the cash prize will be given the asterisk of shame next to them.

There is no cost to enter, but donations to pay for my lunch are gratefully received. Cost of living and all.

The Predictions
Let's start with some Preseason Predos - just for fun. These will be referred back to in May and no doubt mocked relentlessly....

Matchday 1

I'm also putting Matchday 2 up because I want a stress-free return to work after my holiday

Finally - the more the merrier. So please - everyone, ask a friend to play. Last season we had 18 people in the leaderboard at the end of the season. So, let's aim for 35 this season. I send reminders out via the WhatsApp group - so let me know if you want anyone else added - and set alarms and reminders yourself because, let's face it, there'll be at least one week where I forget. I'm happy to send Twitter reminders and considering starting up a MailChimp too, so if there's enough demand for people to play who don't want to be in the WhatsApp group - there'll be an email offering later this season. 

Good luck all!