S7M15: Football should become an indoor sport

I've done my turn sitting in freezing stadia being "entertained" until I have no sensation in any digits, and it's part and parcel of the game. This week though was new for me.

I mean, it clearly wasn't. Cold is like pain. I've obviously experienced that sensation before but I can't remember feeling that miserable in detail. And I wasn't even watching - this was playing so I should have been able to get warm from running around. I swear I didn't warm up until halfway through the next morning - hot showers & duvets be damned.

I raise this issue to show not how hard/soft I am dependent on your perspective for venturing out/moaning about it, but to point out that this is further evidence that the likes of John Terry - short sleeves and gloveless in all climates are not human.

So 2 matchdays on and what have we learnt?

Man City look good still. Man Utd look a better attacking unit with Pogba. Chelsea are quietly rebuilding form. Arsenal are not as awful as we suspect, but not as good as they can appear. Liverpool are as per usual. Spurs are struggling with a smaller squad than others, but that's no-one's fault but their own. Read the same comment as Arsenal. Burnley are having a stormer of a season so far, but if that chip on their fans & their manager's shoulder gets any bigger, they might shatter. Some new managerial blood has arrived - although it looks suspiciously like old managerial blood who we all hope fail miserably.

At Goodison, Unsworth signed off in style with a Wazza hat-trick, ably assisted by Joe Hart for at least 2 of the 3. Nice when an old team-mate helps you out like that. Moyes' career must be done now though surely....4 years have aged him significantly and frankly his methodology doesn't seem to get results anymore. Clement also seems to have hit a brick wall in Swansea - his card must also be marked. Gotta feel Mark Hughes ain't much longer for this league either...

2 sets of results to get through so let's get statty:

M13:
24 people played
Most popular predicted results: Man Utd, Man City & Spurs WINS (24/24)
Most disputed result: Liverpool vs Chelsea (8-8-8 split)

Highest odds: Doron Salomon (1433/1)
Lowest odds: Josh Daniels (600/1)
Average odds: 1017/1

Best predictor: Doron (9/10)
Worst predictor: Loads of us (4/10)
Average score: 5.33/10

Best predicted results: Man Utd & Man City WINS (24/24)
Worst predicted result: Spurs vs WBA DRAW (0/24)

M14:
24 people played
Most popular predicted results: Arsenal, Man City & Chelsea WINS (24/24)
Most disputed results: WBA vs Newcastle & Everton vs West Ham (9-7-8 split)

Highest odds: AFM (723/1)
Lowest odds: Doron Salomon (271/1)
Average odds: 602/1

Best predictor: Nick Collins (9/10)
Worst predictors: Matt Abbott & Nick Jones (4/10)
Average score: 6.17/10

Best predicted results: Arsenal, Man City & Chelsea WINS (24/24)
Worst predicted result: Leicester WIN (2/24)

Everyone's results:

Leaderboard (>2/3; 10/14)

This week's predos:

Chelsea vs Newcastle - CHELSEA
Brighton vs Liverpool - LIVERPOOL
Everton vs Huddersfield - EVERTON
Leicester vs Burnley - DRAW
Stoke vs Swansea - STOKE
Watford vs Spurs - SPURS
WBA vs Crystal Palace - WBA
Arsenal vs Man Utd - DRAW
Bournemouth vs Southampton - BOURNEMOUTH
Man City vs West Ham - MAN CITY

Total odds: 776/1

Good luck guys

S7M14: Don't push your luck

I'm not bloody Amazon Prime. No chance of a 2 day turn around in these parts.

Weekday predos:

Brighton vs Crystal Palace - DRAW
Leicester vs Spurs - SPURS
Watford vs Man Utd - MAN UTD
WBA vs Newcastle - DRAW
Arsenal vs Huddersfield - ARSENAL
Bournemouth vs Burnley - BOURNEMOUTH
Chelsea vs Swansea - CHELSEA
Everton vs West Ham - EVERTON
Man City vs Southampton - MAN CITY
Stoke vs Liverpool - LIVERPOOL

Weekend predos & results to follow

S7M13: It's Happened Again (not that one)

The average odds for a 10 match accumulator in Season 1 of Impossibilitee were around 3000/1. With an average of 25 players per week, that's 950 bets a year. Except it's not 'cos often a gameweek isn't included but bear with me. We're 6 1/3 seasons in, so that's a little over 6000 opportunities, so we'd expect 2 maximums in this time period, which is exactly what we had - with 2 on the same week a few years ago (FT, ECI).

Well, we're now ahead of the curve. Sam Ruback's previous life highlight was arguably seeing Alex Song's Range Rover. Well no more amigos, time for a change to that twitter bio...

(I was tempted to use a gif of a certain German playmaker enjoying a brew but didn't want anyone to be upset by it...)

It makes me so proud watching y'all spread your wings and improve. Average weekly score of 6.84 with 25 players. Pretty damn good folks. Give yourselves all a round of applause (Nacho style).

The weekend kicked off with a cracker of a Derby at the Emirates. The footballing karma equalised itself at the earliest opportunity, with Arsenal deserving the win, but benefiting from a mistake from the officials. Callum Wilson showed his touch hadn't deserted him during his injury layoff, burying Huddersfield. Burnley & Man City continued their good form, as did Chelsea & Watford. Pogba inspired Man Utd on his return from injury, whilst Salah et al destroyed a blunt Southampton. Dodgy reffing reared its head on the South coast, denying Brighton a penalty in their draw with Stoke, whilst Everton also drew with Palace, Niasse getting both goals, along with a now confirmed history-making 2 match ban for diving. Stupid rule that, as previously discussed.

Let's get statty:

Matchday 11
24 people played
Most popular predicted result: Spurs WIN (24/24)
Most disputed result: Huddersfield vs WBA (11-6-7 split)

Highest odds: Josh Daniels (29,389/1)
Lowest odds: Feneley (4965/1)
Average odds: 11,476/1

Best predictor: 4 of yous (6/10)
Worst predictors: Nick Taylor-Collins (2/10)
Average score: 4.40/10

Best predicted result: Spurs WIN (24/24)
Worst predicted result: Bournemouth WIN (2/24)

Matchday 12
25 people played
Most popular predicted result: Man Utd WIN (25/25)
Most disputed result: Crystal Palace vs Everton (9-8-8 split)

Highest odds: Josh Daniels (5739/1)
Lowest odds: Doron (1412/1)
Average odds: 2915/1

Best predictor: Sam Ruback (10/10)
Worst predictors: Joe Abbott, Steven Daniels & Menachem Grunewald (5/10)
Average score: 6.84/10

Best predicted result: Man Utd WIN (25/25)
Worst predicted result: Brighton vs Stoke DRAW (6/25)

Everyone's results:

To the leaderboard (>2/3; 9/12)

To this week's predos - remember the Friday night game!:

West Ham vs Leicester - LEICESTER
Crystal Palace vs Stoke - CRYSTAL PALACE
Man Utd vs Brighton - MAN UTD
Newcastle vs Watford - NEWCASTLE
Swansea vs Bournemouth - BOURNEMOUTH
Spurs vs WBA  - SPURS
Liverpool vs Chelsea - CHELSEA
Southampton vs Everton - DRAW
Burnley vs Arsenal - ARSENAL
Huddersfield vs Man City - MAN CITY

Good luck guys

S7M12: Might need a scarf for this weekend

Unfortunately work's run away from me this week so haven't had a chance to do the stats from before the international break.

So just the predos for now...check back next week for the whole thang

Arsenal vs Spurs - DRAW
Bournemouth vs Huddersfield - BOURNEMOUTH
Burnley vs Swansea - BURNLEY
Crystal Palace vs Everton - DRAW
Leicester vs Man City - MAN CITY
Liverpool vs Southampton - LIVERPOOL
WBA vs Chelsea - CHELSEA
Man Utd vs Newcastle - MAN UTD
Watford vs West Ham - WATFORD
Brighton vs Stoke - BRIGHTON

S7M11: Pep Rally

The early game was the much-hyped near-top of the table clash between Mourinho's grizzled lot & the young Poch project, playing the role of Hollywood hero. Frankly, in these games, the script often doesn't go the way of the public hope. The public probably being anyone in North London, because whilst those of a white persuasion had the obvious investment, those on the red team were stuck between a rock and a hard place, only a much worse version.

Anyway, Veterans 1-0 Yoof.

Then to London. West Ham thought they'd relieved some pressure on Bilic...well...Joe Hart had relieved some pressure on Bilic but Antoniio dithered, Zaha didn't and Palace had their 4th goal and 4th point of the season.

Arsenal won their 13th game in a row at home - stadium record that, coming form behind to beat a Swansea side really struggling to get going this season. Liverpool won comfortably against Huddersfield, as did City against WBA to register the best start to a league season from any side. 2 late goals there didn't really reflect the game.

Tight away wins for Stoke at Watford & Chelsea at Bournemouth both come as welcome relief (not that there's ever a bad time to win away) whilst honours even on the south coast.

Everton's woes continued as new boss Puel won on debut for Leicester, and then Burnley won a tight game to best Newcastle and keep their great start to the season going.

Let's get statty:

This week, 25 people played
Most popular predicted results: Man City & Liverpool WINS (25/25)
Most disputed prediction: Burnley vs Newcastle (7-10-8 split respectively)

Highest odds:  Doron Salomon 1249/1
Lowest odds: Steven Daniels 601/1
Average odds: 829/1

Best predictors: David Brickman & Josh Gaon (9/10)
Lowest predictors: Me & Matt Abbott (4/10)
Average score: 6.28/10

Best predicted results: Man City & Liverpool WINS (25/25)
Worst predicted result: Stoke WIN (0/25)


Everyone's scores:

Leaderboard (>2/3; 7/10)

This week's predos:

Stoke vs Leicester - LEICESTER

Huddersfield vs WBA - HUDDERSFIELD

Newcastle vs Bournemouth - NEWCASTLE

Southampton vs Burnley - BURNLEY

Swansea vs Brighton - DRAW

West Ham vs Liverpool - LIVERPOOL

Spurs vs Crystal Palace - SPURS

Man City vs Arsenal - DRAW

Chelsea vs Man Utd - MAN UTD

Everton vs Watford - EVERTON

Good luck guys

S7M10: Kooey

Nearly a quarter of the way through the season and we're starting to see the usual stratification at the top. Man City are the only unbeaten side left and have opened a 5 point lead at the top after Man Utd stumbled, losing to Huddersfield. Must. Not. Laugh. Again.

Chelsea overcame Watford in a hard-fought game whilst North London battered Liverpool twice in 2 hours. On Friday night (grrrrr), Brighton got a great result, beating West Ham at the Taxpayer Arena, and their weekend got even better when Crystal Palace reverted to type, losing to Newcastle.

Leicester, Bournemouth & Southampton also won. Not much to add there.

Crystal Palace really are in trouble. The others  in the bottom few places all have mitigation, but I reckon Stoke are also in for a tough year.

Let's get statty:

This week, 25 people played
Most popular predicted result: Man City WIN (25/25)
Most disputed result: Newcastle vs Crystal Palace (16-6-3 split)

Highest odds: Doron Salomon (3204/1)
Lowest odds: Josh Daniels (317/1)
Average odds: 1101/1

Best predictor: Joni Kleiman (7/10)
Worst predictor: Matt Abbott (3/10)
Average score: 4.72/10

Best predicted result: Man City WIN (25/25)
Worst predicted results: Brighton & Huddersfield WINS (0/25)

Everyone's scores:

Leaderboard (>2/3 weeks; 7/9)

Matchday 10 predos:

Man Utd vs Spurs - DRAW

Arsenal vs Swansea - ARSENAL

Crystal Palace vs West Ham - WEST HAM

Liverpool vs Huddersfield - LIVERPOOL

Watford vs Stoke - WATFORD

WBA vs Man City - MAN CITY

Bournemouth vs Chelsea - CHELSEA

Brighton vs Southampton - BRIGHTON

Leicester vs Everton - DRAW

Burnley vs Newcastle - NEWCASTLE

Good luck guys!

S7M9: The ghost of George Past

I'm gonna start with something blindingly obvious. Man City are a bloody good football team. Guardiola is a bloody good coach. I love watching them play and given the utter disaster that is football in N5, I hope they win the league. Interesting fact: Arsenal's stadium is in N7, but the head office, literally 150m over the bridge is in N5. And you lot think I don't research the drivel that I put out...oh no...this is me prepared...

Anyway, Kevin de Bruyne makes me do funny things. In a not-at-all-clunky-segue, Klopp does funny things too. His Liverpool side were the better team against the most-predictable Mourinho performance of all time. So awfully negative so frequently, and it's barely defensible when it works. It's indefensible when you spend that much and it doesn't. Boo urns.

The Claret & blue derby ended all square as did the some sort of Midlands derby on the Monday & the longest geographical range match between Southampton & Newcastle. Fun fact guys: I ALWAYS go for a home win in this fixture (and it's inverse) because I figure the major travel cooped up in a coach the day before will impact on performance. I refuse to change this view knowing full well that they fly down in an hour or so of comparative luxury. To my detriment however...

Swansea won convincingly against a Huddersfield side regressing after a great start, Spurs won at Wembley which is a shame as that albatross would have been nice to have continued indefinitely. Crystal Palace finally recorded a goal, but it wasn't theirs, so they decided to double up, beating a Chelsea side who are looking a little lost this season. Maybe John Terry went all Bela Gutmann and cursed them when he left...

Brighton & Everton also drew. I have nothing else to add.

Finally to Arsenal arsenaling it up. Let's be clear. Watford deserved as little as we did. They were woeful for the vast majority of the game, and it all hinged on 90 seconds where Ozil missed a sitter and then Richarlison dived and won a penalty. The reaction on the pitch was indefensible and no qualms about that.

I am qualmful however about the ridiculous retrospective panel. It's a farce even if it did work, which it doesn't. How does a retrospective ban undo a huge in game swing? What if it was a last minute of the cup final situation?

Only one answer to this scenario - learn from every other bloody sport and use in-game video replay. Italy manage to use it in Serie A to great effect in the Juve-Lazio game on the same weekend and nobody complained. Get these decisions right at the time for the love of Dennis.

Let's get statty:

This week, 24 people played
Most popular predicted results: Chelsea, Man City & Spurs WINS (24/24)
Most disputed result: Brighton vs Everton (8-7-9 split)

Highest odds: Steven Daniels 8478/1
Lowest odds: Josh Daniels 795/1
Average odds: 2891/1

Best predictors: Loads of yous (6/10)
Worst predictors: Me & Tarek (2/10)
Average score: 4.08/10

Best predicted results: Man City & Spurs WINS (24/24)
Worst predicted result: Palace WIN (0/24)

Everyone's result:

Leaderboard (>2/3 weeks; 6/8)

Matchday 9 predictions:

West Ham vs Brighton - WEST HAM

Chelsea vs Watford - DRAW

Huddersfield vs Man Utd - MAN UTD

Man City vs Burnley - MAN CITY

Newcastle vs Crystal Palace - NEWCASTLE

Stoke vs Bournemouth - STOKE

Swansea vs Leicester - SWANSEA

Southampton vs WBA - SOUTHAMPTON

Everton vs Arsenal - ARSENAL

Spurs vs Liverpool - SPURS

Good luck guys!